Preface

Stepping out of sequence here to include this:

How many a man has dated a new era in his life from the reading of a book! 

Thoreau

My original purpose in undertaking this project was simply to transfer the journal entries written during my back-to-nature experiment begun in August of 2002 and ending in December of 2003 for the purpose of having a legible and permanent record of this special time in my life to present to my two adult children.  As I began the process, it soon became apparent that my journal entries, with a few exceptions) weren’t going to cut it. They were lacking in detail and insight, observations on weather and daily activities with very little attention to my inner thoughts or how I generally felt about the experience. 

A couple of years ago a friend of a friend, on being told of my adventure suggested that I might enjoy reading Robert Kull’s book, Solitude: Seeking Wisdom in Extremes: A year Alone in the Patagonia Wilderness (2009). And they were right, I did thoroughly enjoy reading Kull’s account of his own experiment. Certainly it was a much more ambitious undertaking than my own but I did feel a certain kinship with him as I read of his exploits. 

It wasn’t until much later however, after I had begun this project in fact, that it occurred to me that the format he had used was perfect for my own situation. Kull explains the process as follows:

In places, I’ve set reflective “Interludes” between journal entries to add perspective. These were written afterward, and they step back from the immediate intensity of my experience in solitude to reflect on important ideas or aspects of the year. But the heart of the story beats within the hours, days and months of the journal.

Kull (Pp ix,x)

It was a minor revelation when I rediscovered Kull’s book because I new that I’d solved a major problem about how to present my story. I don’t know what the rules are about plagiarizing a book’s format but I hope to avoid any potential problems by herein acknowledging my act of piracy and emphatically thanking Mr. Kull for the insight. 

So as not to be accused of being entirely lacking in originality, I have chosen to replace Kull’s “Interludes” with “Reflections” but despite the name change, my own ramblings will serve much the same purpose as did his. 

It’s unfortunate that I didn’t pay more attention to my journalling during those seventeen months but, in retrospect, they do contain some insight into my time there and in other instances serve to jog my memory so that those experiences not recorded can be recalled with some semblance of accuracy such that they don’t fail entirely as interesting reading on their own although it will be left to future readers to determine if I’m correct on this matter. I am simply too close to them to judge whether they make good reading or not.

And further to the topic of my skimpy journal entries Robert Kull's insight offers a suggestion as to why I too may have been less than enthusiastic about my own writing. "Thus the writing tended to pull me out of the present moment and mute the intensity of the experience ...Remaining silent was often preferable." Or maybe it's just a convenient excuse but looking back, I believe there may be some semblance of truth to the matter. 

The quotes at the beginning of each or the Reflections chapters also betray my debt of gratitude to Henry David Thoreau whose seminal work Walden (1854) had a significant impact on my life both when I originally read it and on later readings, at least one of which was during the time portrayed in this work. I would even go so far as to say that it was the reading of  Walden which planted the seed which resulted in my adventure and ultimately, this memoir. 

At Last

Saturday, August 24

Enjoying myself this cloudy but seasonably warm Saturday evening. The crickets have been serenading me for the last hour or so as I sit here by the fireplace watching what must truly be a wonder of nature. Mutitudes of dragon flies fill the air around me. When I make the effort to watch a single individual, I find their aerobatic skills to be amazing - rolls, loops, flips, slides, stalls and spins - they’re all there and performed faultlessly putting any man-made flying machine to shame....

Speaking of hunter and hunted, I found another small red squirrel, dead, among the cedars bordering the cabin which brings to three the number which have fallen prey to Molly the killer Collie in the last twenty-four hours.... Her tally, to date, is half a dozen grey squirrels, a chipmunk and a muskrat in addition to her latest victims.

Sunday, August 25

Dreamt that I was back in class last night and was panicking because I was unprepared and had no idea what I was going to do next.... old habits die hard as this is the time of year when I would be going in to school to prepare for the upcoming year. Got to admit, it feels pretty good to know that, for the first time in twenty-three years, I won’t be going through this ritual ...

Monday, August 26

Had a surprise visitor about a half hour ago...a plain clothes police officer.... He explained that he’d noticed fresh tracks in the driveway so wondered if anyone was living here. He asked a few questions about whether I’d be living here full time, did I have a well, was my truck 4-wheel drive and so on...

Cooked a salmon filet on the open fire tonight and had rice for the first time since I’ve arrived. Also picked some raspberry leaves off young shoots and made tea...

Tuesday, August 27

...worked on the last bit of trench for the telephone cable. It was by far the hardest part of the entire job due to the variety of numerous large and small rocks in the soil. 

It’s a beautiful day, warm and sunny but with a cool breeze. Went to neighbour's to download e-mail, then we took the dogs for a walk...

While there, I mentioned my visitor of yesterday evening. My neighbour immediately proceeded to ask questions about his appearance... He...told me that I’d been visited by the local narc whose job it was to drive the local roads in search of grow sites. And here I thought he was just looking out for my best interests. I can be so naive sometimes. 

For lunch I had pancakes with blackberries I’d harvested at the bottom of the hill... I again roasted some corn and it was delicious. Also had potatoes, onion and garlic roasted in foil all cooked on an open fire.

Wednesday, August 28

Walked the woods again this morning to see if I could figure out where the western boundary of my property is located.... 

...phoned Bell who, after a frustrating  half hour, said that I’d have my phone by September 20. Whoopee. So…came home and went for a walk... As I was nearing home, I heard what sounded like trucks or heavy machinery and as I rounded the bend what should appear but just that and they had a telephone pole to boot...They said they’d gotten the work order on Monday so, going by what I’d been told on the phone earlier, they hadn’t put the work order in because they were waiting to hear from me that the tree trimming was completed. It’s quite obvious that the right hand doesn’t know what the left is doing. Hmmm a lack of communication in a company whose business is communications. Just a little bit of irony there huh? Bureaucracy, you gotta love it... 

For the present, I’m relaxing, sipping on a Glayva and scotch on the rocks (my version of a rusty nail), by way of celebration at being one step closer to getting a telephone. What a headache this little convenience has been. 

I also have a batch of sumac tea steeping in the sun which I will soon strain to drink later.

Thursday, August 29

Skipped meditation this morning so I could get down to fell the last tree obstructing the path to my newly installed pole only to find that there were already two Bell guys there putting up the line!...Now all I have to do is get the cable hooked up at the house, do the interior wiring and I’ll be in business...

Friday. August 30

Recieved another pleasant surprise today. It would seem that the September 20 date for my telephone installation got moved up to today with the result that, are you ready for it?, I am now officially hooked up to the outside world. That’s three weeks minus a day early. Consequently, I have a working telephone, and internet to boot.

On another note, things have evolved such that Thanksgiving dinner will be happening here this year.... Guess I’d better get to work on the summer kitchen some time soon. If everyone comes, I could end up with a dozen guests not only for dinner but for the better part of the long weekend.

So, that’s about it. Life is not terribly exciting here but it is peaceful and each time Molly and I go for a walk in the woods we discover something new even if it’s just a bunch of mushrooms which weren’t there the previous day or the way the sun’s rays reach through the trees, casting shadows and highlighting the vegetation making it appear completely different from the last time we walked the same path. Life is good.

Utilities

Saturday, August 10

Ate lunch with Chuck and Josh around noon yesterday before they left for Tillsonburg. I then went to the bank in Apsley as planned only to find that the ATM was out of order and the bank itself closed. I took the bike so it was a pleasant drive across 620 and it’s significantly shorter than going via Bancroft. I felt terrible about leaving Molly behind and had no choice but to lock her in the house as she’s never been tied up and I’m not sure how she would react. Maybe I should build her a dog house.

I spoke to a Bell engineer over the phone and am now looking into getting a radio phone... According to him, I would have to install poles and cut down several dozen trees to make a corridor between the house and the road several hundred metres to the north and all at my expense estimated to be several thousand dollars. And aesthetically, the idea of having a corridor through the bush from the road to the house is even more repugnant than the cost... If it were solely up to me, I’d forgo the whole telephone business just to avoid the aggravation it’s causing. But I know the kids, especially Lisa, won’t have it. 

Now for the good news. Mike from Wescrafts was just out to evaluate the site for solar power with the result that I’ve ordered a complete system including two panels, two batteries, a converter, cables and mounting pole which he will have ready for me to install by this time next week.The best site for the panels is at the crest of the hill about five metres west of the house. Aesthetically the location is not the best as they’ll always be in my face so to speak but I can certainly live with that. And in practical terms, the closer the better because the longer the cables the more power is lost transporting it to the house.

I also found a suitable but tentative location for the new outhouse which, unlike the existing one and my soon to be solar panels is completely out of sight of the cabin. It’s actually just the west and a few metres north of the large white pine so it’s still reasonably close which I am sure I’ll appreciate in the dead of winter. The ground is very sandy so, with the exception of tree roots, it should be easy digging. This is still tentative because I can’t be certain of the depth of the sand until I start digging in ernest. There is always the possibility that I’ll hit a large slab of granite which will dash any chance of using this location. Here’s hoping.

I finally got around to meditating this morning for about 45 minutes. Immediately afterwards Molly and I went for a walk in the woods. Later on, we went to town to the library to check my finances and research a few things on the web. Bought beer and ice and returned home. It was another very hot day and the spring seems to be on its way to drying up again. Tomorrow I may have to do some more digging.

Alone at Last

Wednesday, August 7

This morning as Lisa and I were going into town, there was a Jersey cow on the road so I pulled into the closest lane and knocked on the door to let the suspected owners know that one of their herd was loose. There was no answer so I assumed there was no one home. A few minutes later as we sat wondering what to do, we spotted a kid of fifteen or so coming out of the house. He immediately proceeded to herd the cow back into the pasture. We surmised that he probably had orders not to answer the door but then must have noticed the cow when he looked to see who was there. On the return trip we saw a deer not far from the same spot. 

I have been rethinking my idea about building a separate bath and meditation building and think I’ll just stick with the plan to build the small addition onto the house instead – a summer kitchen. The wood cookstove I hope to purchase simply won’t fit in the existing space and by providing lots of ventilation and installing a door between the original structure and the addition, I’ll be able to use the cookstove in summer without heating up the rest of the house. The bathhouse, as welcome an addition as it would be, is a luxury, so it can wait. I must be practical here.

On Tuesday I discovered that the spring had dried up so yesterday morning I started digging and now have water again. I really must get to that spring house soon so I’ll have refrigeration. On the other hand, it’s probably a good idea to wait to see just how reliable this spring is going to be. No point in investing a lot of time and money into a spring house if I can’t count on the spring being there most of the year.

Ah, finally, the day I’ve been anticipating, my first day alone, although I expect Chuck and Josh to stop by to drop off Mike’s tent before they head for home. Slept like a baby last night. It’s another sunny, cool morning but it’s supposed to warm up to the mid twenties by afternoon. I got CBC on the small solar radio for the first time since arriving - Ontario Morning. Reception seems very poor here, and no signal for cell phones according to my visitors. To improve reception on the radio, I wrapped a piece of aluminum foil around the antennae, a temporary solution until I can figure out something more effective and permanent. 

I feel fantastic and my mood is best described as one of pure elation. A great sense of contentment has swept over me, a portent that I am going to be very happy here. The sun is shining intently high overhead, only occasionally slipping behind one of the cumulus clouds that dot the sky. It’s not overly hot, a steady gentle breeze caresses my skin and my little piece of paradise is turning out to be everything I’d hoped it would be. How could I be anything but elated in such circumstances.

Looking Back

This excerpt appears in a section on my lifelong connection with nature:
In later years, in the western Arctic, we were exposed to a vastly different landscape, the boreal forest. Here we lived on the edge of Wood Buffalo National Park. It was, as the name suggests, “…a home where the buffalo roam.” where it was not at all unusual to encounter these massive creatures either grazing in the ditches, or worse, on the road itself forcing us to to stop until they saw fit to allow us to pass...

The second most abundant large mammal to frequent the boreal forests was the black bear. In one spring and early summer alone, I had ten sightings...The only time I felt nervous about a bear encounter was on a weekend camping trip with a troup of cubs. I’d risen early in the morning to step otside the cabin to see what the new day had to offer. As I stood at the water’s edge taking in the morning air I sensed a movement behind me and turned around to see a large black bear standing tall on its hind legs about 20 metres away its head bobbing as it sniffed the air. At that exact second the door to the cabin opened a one of the cubs stepped out and yelled to me. Not wanting to spook the bear who was eyeing me by this time, I used slow very deliberate hand gestures to signal to him to turn around and go back into the cabin, which he did. At the sound of the door closing the bear dropped to all fours, did an about face and disappeared into the bush. For the rest of the weekend we just encouraged the kids to be as noisy as they liked as we explored the surrounding area. No more bears were seen. 

Also in the woods adjoining our back yard was a groomed cross country ski trail. Consequently, my first choice of recreational transportation of the eastern Arctic, the snowmobile, was replaced by a pair of cross country skis, wooden of course - none of those wax-less, plastic-coated impersonators for me. If I was going to take up skiing then I wanted to do it right which included learning the fine arts of tarring and waxing...

...my most memorable skis were those taken during a full moon and one in particular will forever be indelibly imprinted on my memory. Mere words can never do it justice but I will recount it here as best I can.

The night in question was ideal for a moonlight ski, not the slightest hint of a cloud, northern lights dancing across the sky, the air crisp and clean and icy cold, the already snow-covered ground blanketed with a fresh dusting of snow...

After a half hour of silently gliding amongst the frozen shadows, I unexpectantly found myself thrust into the most breathtakingly beautiful scene. I can still recall, with amazing clarity, the sight of the meadow awash in the light of a full moon, stars mirrored, sequin-like, on the snowy blanket stretched out before my eyes, forced to squint against the bedazzling brilliance of it all while high above the brilliant moon and countless stars, hung there, inert, illuminating the scene. My toque-enveloped ears sensitive to the intense silence broken only occasionally by the muffled echo of the rapids far below borne upward by the frozen mist off the still open water. The frigid air prickling at the exposed skin on my face, biting at my nostrils, every out-breath, a plume of frozen condensation on the still motionless air as I stood, enraptured, as much a part of this setting as the the trees at my side, the only witnesses and sole companions poised there along the margins of this magical scene. 

...The memory of the experience haunted me for days afterward and still, when brought to mind, brings back that feeling of wonder and awe which visit each of us from time to time. It was by no means the first or only experience of its kind but it was certainly the one with the most impact. In fact, it helped me to understand both past and later experiences of a similar nature and has been incorporated into my understanding of Buddhism. 

Our moments of inspiration are not lost though we have no particular poem to show for them; for those experiences have left an indelible impression, and we are ever and anon reminded of them.

Thoreau

Day 1

Full text of day one in my new home:

That man is rich whose pleasures are the cheapest.

    Thoreau

Tuesday, July 30

First day in the new digs as a full time resident. I’m sitting on my Maple Leafs chair in the shade of a small but amply foliaged choke-cherry tree to escape the heat of one very hot and humid day. Spent some time putting things away, coming to the realization that I still have way too much stuff, and then gained a great deal of satisfaction from my first outdoor solar shower, the mechanics of which consist of a black plastic bag placed on the roof of the house with about five feet of tubing  terminating in a stop-cock. The water was almost too hot as the roof is black tarpaper and in full sun. I thought I’d better shower now because Lisa, Jenn, Marcus and Tia have gone swimming and I obviously can’t be caught running about naked when they return. Poor little Tia pretty much lost it the other day when she saw a harmless little butterfly. Imagine how she’d react if she were to come upon a scrawny, stark-naked, unshaven, fifty-five year old man baring it all as she came around the bend of the driveway? Whoa, pretty scary. 

Chuck, who rode up with me yesterday, is napping on the hammock. I had intended to follow his lead and take a nap myself but feel totally rejuvenated after my shower. Earlier, I went down the hill to check the spring and, although the level of the pool has dropped a little, it is still trickling out from under the tree and the water is as cool as ever. I must take a thermometer down one of these times to find out just how cool it is. Must also look up plans for a spring house to use as a refrigerator substitute. It would certainly be better than buying ice every two or three days which is fine for a one or two week camping trip but this is long term and requires a long term solution. An actual working refrigerator is not an option.

As usual a brisk breeze is blowing, okay, perhaps ‘brisk’ is a little too strong a word, but the aptly named trembling aspens shimmering in the sun give the impression that the breeze is stronger than it actually is. No matter, the effect is that the high temperatures we’ve been experiencing are much more tolerable because of it. Time to set some priorities in order to get this place in shape for the upcoming months.

Oops, the shower bag just fell off the roof. I checked it and it survived the fall unscathed so I refilled it and placed it back on the roof, a little more securely this time.

Back to priority setting.

- Purchase some two by six rough pine to build a butcher block type countertop in the kitchen complete with sink and storage shelves. This will provide a much needed indoor food prep area and additional storage for cooking utensils.

-draw up plans...

Screw it, who needs a list? One thing at a time suits me and my new lifestyle just fine. I never was much good at laying out long term plans, hated it actually, which didn’t bode all that well as a teacher but I survived by doing the bare minimum, or less, on more occasions than not. And now that I’m my own boss why put myself through all that pain. There, glad I got that out of the way. Man, I think I’m going to be very happy here!

On Choosing the Property

After making the drive north, equipped with a short-list of a dozen or so potential properties to view, our first stop was a real estate agent who gave us a list of a half dozen properties to look at. Only one of these was even moderately appealing, mostly because of the timber frame home and outbuildings but it scored a big fat zero on the isolation factor, was slightly more money than I’d hoped to spend and was only six acres. 

Having struck out with the real estate agent we then tackled the list which I’d compiled the previous fall. The whole process is pretty much a blur now but after looking at and eliminating all but one of the properties from my list, we decided to visit a real estate office in the nearby town of Bancroft to make enquiries about it and some of the other properties we’d discovered on our travels. It turned out that the agent we talked to had listed the property we’d just visited so my son and I, now aware of all the details, decided to return one more time. We now knew that the property was twenty-one and a half acres of mixed bush with some meadow, the size was more than adequate, it had an existing habitable building and a passable driveway. And, of no small import, the asking price of thirty thousand was achievable.

This time we walked the property for a closer look and also crawled in through an unlocked window to look at the interior of the one hundred seventy-six square foot cabin. We then set about weighing the advantages and disadvantages of the property. In addition to the above considerations, the closest neighbour was within earshot and was even visible through the now bare tree tops although I suspected that once the trees leafed out this would no longer be a problem.